A long time ago and after many years of experience in clinic practice, I have observed that the psychoanalytic method is wonderful in itself since it enables to access to information banned in our consciousness. However, it is not enough. Session after session, my patients repeated their problems, even though the pain with time ceased, after a short period of time, they came to repeat the same accusing symptoms of their repeated pathology. That is what Psychoanalysis means.
I started to think that Psychoanalysis is wonderful but the healing is not complete, perhaps it is that way , and this is part of a method which cannot be asked to give more than that.
Some specific symptoms even with new integrated elements, with new decodings from the therapist were repeated.
The patients repeat their symptoms in line with their pathologies. Although psychoanalytic treatments do not respond to a determined period of time as regards the cure, I observe that many years were needed to be able to see some result in the ceasing of the symptoms and in the desired emotional stability.
In that moment I started to think about the difference between CURING and HEALING, I knew there had to be something else so I would complete my psychotherapeutic practice. It is known that the current medicine, excellent and necessary as regards the illness, treats the symptoms but not the causes of the illness itself, so there had to be something else.
“CURING is treating the symptoms of the pathologic manifestation, repairing the damages caused by the illness.
HEALING is eradicating the emotional elements that caused that illness in a definite way.”
Dr D Winnicott, pediatrician and British analyst , conceptualizes “ the good enough mother” and he holds that she is the one who carries out the active adaptation to the baby´s necessities in his first years of life, then it decreases little by little , according to the increasing capacity of the kid to face failure as regards the adaptation to the media and to tolerate the results of that frustration, that adaptation demands a quiet and tolerant concern as regards the baby.
“ the good enough mother” starts with nearly a hundred percent adaptation towards her child ´s necessities and, when time goes by, she adapts little by little in a less complete form each time in accordance with her child´s capacity to face this drawback , that is to say, his independence.
At the beginning, there is nearly a hundred percent adaptation of the mother to the baby´s necessities. Then, she starts to disillusion the baby gradually which is going to be important but she is not going to accomplish it if she didn´t offer him enough opportunities of illusion at the beginning, if she didn’t offer herself an object of unconditional love.
“There is no possible health for a human being that has not being initiated the good enough for the mother” (D Winnicott)
“There is no possible health for a patient who has not been initiated and guided well enough for the therapist” (Verónica Gomelsky)
So What would the good enough therapist ´s responsibility be?, isn´t the same result expected? Perhaps Wouldn´t the therapist take the patient in bond so from there on and through an affectionate transfer, re-living the primary bond, elaborate and heal it, and as the treatment goes on give the patient the necessary elements for his healing and independence?
“I don´t heal anybody, I teach them to heal themselves, that is my only goal.”
That is why I have understood with time that apart from our heredity reflected in our physical features, we inherit, as I name it, our heritage link ., our way of being in contact with ours and love them, based on the matrix in which we were born.
There are tracks that leave marks for the rest of our lives, those that the human beings have received since we were born and it is symbolized by the birth moon. For Astrology, The birth moon represents the MOTHER.
The mother is the initial transmitter of that ´affective base matrix¨, it is what protects us and assure the love at the beginning, but if it is not removed as time goes by and after our learning it is repeated automatically the rest of our existence.
For those who believe that a plan exists and that we incarnate to acquire experience and knowledge, ¨this mother ¨ is chosen by ourselves because the soul understands that it is the ¨ ideal circumstance ¨ to achieve with the ¨soul´s plan¨ goal.
This is my method of work, working with the matrix base in each of my patients and providing them with the necessary elements for THE BUILDING OF A NEW MATRIX , that is going to be related in this new stage with our true essence, for this it is necessary to leave the secure and protective structure, the old uterus, the old home, that was useful for our first years of live but which kept throughout the time would be absolute pathological, so it is necessary to offer oneself as a therapist in transference bond, inside a set up frame so that the patient can do the transition from a known and familiar territory to a new and sane one but at the beginning lived as unknown and chaotic.
Do not forget that what is inherited at a family level in the people´s behavior, even though they don´t know it consciously, if it is not solved, it is REPEATED for the rest of our lives, causing pain and unhappiness.
Even though the matrix is fundamental in the first years of life, it should expire with time to open the way for a new construction that allows to transmit the new requirements of the incarnated soul according to the soul´s learning , I WONDER HOW MANY THERAPISTS ARE WILLING TO DO THIS WORK, this is my essence, I love what I do, this is my PASSION and I am sure that the souls which are willing to solve these problems at their roots will come to me, so that the repetition wasn´t a simple automatic mechanism of old ailments, but of new learning.
According to Winnicott, the forefather of the mirror is the mother´s face, what does the baby see when he looks at the mother´s face? He sees himself… ¨the mother looks at him and what she seems is related to what she sees in him¨…
It is not a madness to link and it is nothing new, the dependence of the patient as regards the therapist, in that sense, which the difference would be with the dependence in the early childhood, so we can link the dependence in the psychoanalytic transference with the dependence in the matrix of the early childhood, it is important, and I AM A HUNDRED PERCENT RESPONSIBLE FOR THE FOLLOWING:
“MY PATIENTS ARE HEALED FOR THE REDEFINED BOND IN THE TRANSFERENCE WITH ME, AND NOT ONLY FOR THE THERAPEUTIC ELEMENTS THEMSELVES, BUT ALSO FOR THE BOND LOVE, RECREATING THAT PRIMARY MATRIX SO, FROM THERE ON, THEY ARE ABLE TO BUILD A NEW MATRIX IN THEIR LIVES.”
Disease is socially feared, fear was planted on disease, disease in itself is a problem. However, it is beneficial, it is an opportunity since the very nature of the disease is a useful guide to discover which the emotional conflict of base responsible for it is, by eradicating this, we eradicate the disease avoiding repetition.
The disease works as a warning, a sign, a signal of what has not been solved emotionally yet.
There are always messages and signals before the emergency of the physical pathology, before pain and physical suffering are applied and although we don´t know the link consciously, our souls do know it, they show us the problem through our bodies in order to heal the emotional conflict base.
The physical disease is the final period of a much deeper disorder, it is the last place where the symptom shouts, in fact the area of the body affected itself is not a coincidence, but it is directly related to the emotional conflict that caused the physical pain, THE DISEASE IS NOT ACCIDENTAL.
It is time to wake up, never forget that what a person pretends is what he capitalizes as disease.
“THERE IS ONLY A PERSON IN THIS WORLD CAPABE OF HEALING YOU: YOURSELF.”
Helping to HEAL is a divine service and a privileged way which only consists of GIVING protection, elements and guide, exactly the same as the GOOD ENOUGH MOTHER, entailing a short period, after which each patient should have the sufficient elements in the reconstruction of his new matrix that allows him to live in harmony, peace and happiness.
IT IS NOT TRUE THAT HAPPINESS IS EPHEMERAL, happiness, harmony, physical and mental health are possible, it is not a utopia.
Living self-assured, in freedom and abundance is possible!!!
It is my proposal, it is my passion, here I found the key for HEALING MYSELF AND MY PATIENTS.